


I've Fallen From Grace

by ironfamjam



Series: Tumblr Prompts Collection [1]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Iron Dad, Irondad, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 19:03:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17813726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ironfamjam/pseuds/ironfamjam
Summary: Prompt: “Don’t you love me anymore?” and "You’re hurting me.”





	I've Fallen From Grace

Peter can’t feel his feet. He’s running in the sewer, the frigid water seeping into his suit. He hears rumbling laughter behind him and his eyes dart around in fear. He can’t feel his fingers, they’re so cold. He’s so cold. He spins around. There’s no way out. He’s stumbling in the dark, the slimy rocks smear against his back when he bumps into the wall. 

He’s so cold he’s so cold.

The laughter echoes around him and he feels his eyes droop. He’s going to pass out. He’s going to fall into the grimy water and he’s going to die in this sewer and no one would ever know. They’d never find him. May and Mr. Stark would have to bury him without a body. 

He should’ve called Mr. Stark. He should’ve…

\------------------------------------

Peter wakes up in Medbay.

He blinks, rubbing at his eyes in confusion. There’s a pulse oximeter on his finger and an IV drip in his right arm. He looks around and for the first time since he’d been on a hospital bed- and there’d been too many times- he’s woken up completely alone.

He tries not to be too disappointed. He’s turning eighteen soon. A real adult. He doesn’t need someone to be with him every time he fought the good fight. But still…

“Um…FRIDAY? Is- is May here? And Mr. Stark?”

“Your aunt hasn’t been here at all Peter. And Mr. Stark is busy in his workshop.”

Peter swallows, trying to push whatever feeling that was threatening to film over his eyes down deep where it couldn’t hurt him. “O-oh ok. Um. Would you mind telling him that I’m awake? I want to…I want to talk to him. If that’s okay.” he says quietly, suddenly feeling like he was fourteen again and still awkward around a childhood hero before he became a mentor.

“I’ll see.” FRIDAY responds and Peter feels a sudden chill in the room.

It’s half an hour later before the door opens. Peter holds his breath, watching as Mr. Stark strides in, face blank. Peter feels something stab in his chest, but he tries to smile through it, “Mr. Stark! I’m-” but the main raises a hand.

“Save it Parker. I don’t want to hear it.” 

“I-what?” Peter shrinks back into the hospital bed.

Mr. Stark’s sunglasses are tinted so dark Peter can’t see his expression.

He’s never worn sunglasses around Peter before.

He feels like he’s drowning. Caught in a time before they made room for each other in their lives. Caught in a time before they had inside jokes and shared passwords and a favourite movie snack. A time before Peter knew he had the strength left to try having a father figure again, just one more time. A time before Peter realized he cared about Mr. Stark more than he cared about anyone. 

A time before Mr. Stark loved him. 

“You’re going to say I’m sorry right?” Mr. Stark scoffs, flipping the tv’s remote in his hand, “Say you know you should’ve called me but didn’t because what? You wanted all the glory for yourself? Wanted to prove you’re some big superhero so you can play in the big leagues? Or maybe you wanted to get hurt just for the attention.” Mr. Stark pauses, cocking his head and looking right at him, “They say kids with fucked up pasts do that sometimes. I guess being abandoned by your parents and then killing your uncle does that to you.” he muses.

Peter’s entire body shakes, his fingers paralyzed in their grip around the blanket so tight his knuckles turn white. This isn’t real this isn’t real this isn’t- but Mr. Stark keeps going and every word he says feels like every crushing failure Peter’s ever experienced.

“Honestly, I’m surprised I lasted this long.” Mr. Stark smiles but there’s nothing loving about it, “I’ve given a shit about you and your wellbeing enough haven’t I? I made you a suit, I made you an AI, I gave you my number, I called you, I checked up on you, I did everything for you.” Mr. Stark’s voice picks up and Peter shrinks with the weight of it, “I’ve given you more than I’ve ever given anyone and how do you treat me?”

Peter throws himself forward, desperate and pleading, “I’m sorry I’m so sorry Mr. Stark you have to believe me! I know you do so much for me. I know! And I know I’ve been a burden a lot but please, but please don’t say those things. I didn’t mean to get hurt and I didn’t mean for any of this to happen please-”

But Mr. Stark shakes his head pointing a hard finger at him, “You don’t get to apologize anymore kid.” But the nickname lacks any of its old affection, “I’m done with this. I’m done taking care of you when you can’t be bothered to care about any of us.”

Peter shakes his head, “No, no Mr. Stark you have to listen-”

“Why do you think your aunt isn’t here Peter?”

Peter’s breath hitches.

“She’s done with you too. Couldn’t look at you anymore. She’s tired of you lying all the time. Always sneaking out, always sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong. She’s given up her whole life for you and for what? And frankly, I agree with her. You don’t deserve a fraction of what we give you.”

His voice drops, “We deserve better.”

Peter can’t handle it. The sobs break through him and he trembles with the force of them. He’s gasping so hard he can barely speak but he needs to tell him. He needs to tell him. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. Please. Please. You can’t say that. You can’t say you’re tired of me- I know I’m not perfect and I know I messed up but please- nothing bad happened this time, I’ll be better Mr. Stark. I promise! Just please, please don’t say you’re done with me.”

But Mr. Stark’s stare is blank and Peter knows that any of the love he once had was gone. Extinguished. Like it had never existed at all. And Peter always knew this would happen. Deep down in the darkest reaches of his heart. Ever since his parents died, he knew his life was temporary. That every ounce of happiness could disappear in just an instant. That May and Ben could leave him at any moment. That one day they’d wake up and realize he had ruined their childless youthful existence. That he had stolen away their life. He tried to be good his entire life to make himself as unobtrusive as possible, as unimposing as possible. But it didn’t work it didn’t work. And now this, now Mr. Stark. He should’ve known this was temporary too. That just like everyone else, he would see Peter for what he really was and leave him.

A failure. A liar. An incompetent. Weak and useless and so utterly pathetic all he could is cry as Mr. Stark made his way out the door.

But he can’t leave. He can’t he can’t. He loves him. He loves him he loves him he gave him another home, please. Don’t leave. “Mr. Stark.” Peter sobs, “You can’t leave. I promise I’ll be better- I love you.”

“I don’t care.”

Peter can’t breathe through his tears.

“You love me too. I know you do. I know you do!” But Mr. Stark’s shaking his head, but Peter can’t be sure because he’s shaking so much harder, “Don’t you love me anymore?” his voice cracks.

Mr. Stark turns around and for a moment, Peter lets himself hope that he would sweep him in his arms like he did sometimes, when things were at their lowest. But instead, Mr. Stark shakes his head like he feels sorry for him, “You really thought this was about anything more than you being Spiderman?”

And when the door closes shut behind him, Peter’s certain he can’t feel anything inside himself anymore.

\----------------------------------

He’s crying, he’s crying so much he’s sure he’s going to die when the walls begin to rip away, the scenery around him twisting and contorting in a way Peter knows should strike him dead with fear but he can’t bring himself to care. In the darkness, he lets himself close his eyes.

But a sharp voice urges him awake. Repeating his name over and over and something hard hits against his cheek. Peter flashes awake, lurching upwards, arms outstretched like he’s ready for a fight. But the man across from him just rolls his eyes. “Oh sure, punch the guy who just saved your life why don’t you?”

Peter’s fear rears its head back up and he jerks away. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please don’t say all that stuff from before I’ll get out of your way right now I promise.” He babbles, feeling his chest tighten as he tries to get up off the couch.

But Mr. Stark’s hands reach out to steady his wobbly movements, a gentle slope to his expression, concern in his eyes, “Woah kid, I was just messing with you. What are you apologizing for?”

And Mr. Stark looks so confused and Peter has no idea what’s happening but it’s then he notices Dr. Strange, who’s staring at him like something awful just occurred to him. “Peter.” he says softly, “Whatever memories you’ve just created weren’t real.”

Peter doesn’t understand. “What?”

“When we found you, Mandela had already gotten to you. He cast a spell, a rudimentary one, but…effective.”

Mr. Stark is still holding his arms, now pressing him back down onto the couch. “You were in pretty rough shape bud, but don’t worry. We caught the bad guy too.” he smiles at Peter but Peter’s too caught up in his entire life shattering to register it.

“The spell he hit you with was The Living Nightmare. It makes you live out your worst fear.” Peter’s eyes widen.

He licks his lips, mouth opening and then closing. “My worst nightmare? So it wasn’t…it wasn’t…”

Dr. Strange shakes his head. “None of it was real Peter.”

Mr. Stark looks between the two of them, noting the tension, and locks Peter down with a stare he can’t break away from. “What’s happening here exactly. Is that why you were apologizing?” Peter looks away. “Peter, whatever you saw. It’s not real.”

Peter squeezes his eyes. He doesn’t know what’s’ real. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t know. Mr. Stark reaches out for him again but Peter flinches violently and the shock that flashes across Mr. Stark’s face is almost enough to make Peter believe nothing he experienced was real. But he isn’t sure. He doesn’t know.

“Peter…” Mr. Stark whispers.

“You hurt me.” Peter says, voice shaking, “I don’t want you to say those things again. I don’t know what’s real! I don’t know if this is real!” he yells and something splinters in Mr. Stark’s face.

“I would never hurt you.” Mr. Stark says, insistent and terrified, “I’d never hurt you Peter.” he repeats, engulfing him in his arms before Peter can stop him.

He squeezes him tight, pressing Peter’s face into his neck and curling his hand around his shoulder. “Whatever I said, whatever you saw. That would never happen. Not in this reality or any reality.”

But Peter doesn’t know. He can’t know. “You don’t even know what I heard.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Mr. Stark says vehemently, “Anything that would make you this afraid is nothing that could be real.”

“You have to trust me.”

Peter grips the back of his shirt. He remembers feeling cold. And then remembers shaking so hard all his feelings fell out. “You stopped loving me.” He says. Because that’s all he can remember.

“I’ll always love you.” Tony promises, holding him tighter. “No matter what. I’ll always love you.”

And Peter hopes this is real.


End file.
